Out With The Old, In With The New

I didn’t really realise how much stuff my old housemate bought into the house. There’s technically not much at all, it’s more just little home wares and things like that. Things like the pictures that I would adjust, some pots with long spiny things in them, plates that sat on the coffee table filled with fake flowers. I must admit, the house kind of looks bland without them. There are also a few kitchen things that she will be taking too, like the saucepans, the toaster and a few of the big serving things from the second drawer. I don’t really know what’s mine or what’s hers, so I just need to wait to see what she decides to steal, and then head out and replace it myself.

Today is the day regardless that old housemate moves out, and then tomorrow new housemate moves in. I will name new housemate B, because that’s what her name starts with. Once I suss out the cool factor of B, she may already be on Twitter, or she may want to read this blog, then we’ll see. I wonder if she will be bringing any home ware stuff to the abode.

As a weird sort of “welcome to the house” I have just invited B and any of her friends to join me at a local Beer, Cider, Wine festival. I am sure there are other things happening at said festival, but who really cares about them? On that though, if you want to come and enjoy Sunday with me, meet me for the first time, or re-hash memories of other times we’ve met, buy yourself some tokens and come on down! It’ll be a grand Sunday Sesh. Check out the details here.

I have also been playing a new app lately called QuizUp to help me not look so stupid at Trivia. If you play this too, hit me up for a challenge. My current title is Smartypants. I remember as a kid thinking “Why would anyone want pants made out of Smarties?”. You can see why I’m so good at trivia.

Have a greet weekend everyone.

If you don’t already, you can follow me on Twitter: @adsy_1

I’m Getting A New Housemate

That’s right, you read those words correctly. This Friday is changeover day, at least I think it’s Friday. It’s sometime this week regardless. Once she has moved in and we have gotten to know each other, I’ll sort out what sort of fun I can do. She may or may not be on Twitter, and if she is, well then I will not be playing any jokes on her. To be honest, I don’t know that I would anyway. It was fun doing them to K because she was susceptible to easy fun pranks, but not everyone is like that. We will see how we go.

In other news, I popped my laksa cherry on the weekend as part of my broadening my horizons and eating new stuff that I haven’t before. I made this decision after I realised that I would generally always eat the same sort of food all the time. Even if I went out to eat, I wouldn’t try something different. This year has been an awakening. So yeah, off I went with @dailebree who was craving a laksa for some weird reason, so I decided that this is a perfect opportunity for me to give it a go. Friends had said to me that it’s usually got a lot of chilli in it. ADSY DOESN’T LIKE CHILLI!! I was pretty worried that Daile was going to end up sitting across from a red faced sweaty man with a burning face. Fortunately, this didn’t happen, although Daile did mention that her laksa needed more chilli. In my opinion it was just right thank you very much. My tolerance for spice peaks at KFC Hot n Spicy, so you can see it’s not that great. Pepper I am fine with, but chilli, no no no. So, I approve of laksa. We went to Thai Wi-Rat in Chinatown, so if you get a chance, go visit.

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Went out for a quiet little Sunday Session yesterday afternoon. Quiet? Oh dear. Anything but. I must admit though, I cheated and started early at Southbank, then went to the Bavarian Beer Café. While I was waiting for @musicbyhux and @amanda_83_au to show up, I was chatting to a Canadian guy called Rick. It was great to chat to him about travelling and his career as a mining engineer where he gets to fly all around the world. I’d like to keep in touch with him and maybe catch up again if he visits, or if I manage to get back to Canada, or wherever he and his wife might be. He owes me a sneaky beer (not really but it’s a good excuse to get a free beer) so I will use that as collateral. We couldn’t convince him to stick around and drink with us after his dinner until his flight at 11:30 that night, and in hindsight, it was a good decision by him. We decided to head to a cocktail bar where I was being a little bit too loud for the other patrons, so I left, got a kebab and went home. I did give Rick the link to my blog, so I hope he reads it after getting a mention.

Anyway, have a great week all. I finally finished all the fantales I was eating to study for trivia. The fantales were nice, they didn’t help with trivia at all though.

Quick Catch Up On Me

It’s been a long time since an update. I didn’t even finish telling you all about my Vietnam trip and the rest of what happened. There is also stuff going down with the housemate and all manner of other fun. This is a rather large post, so settle in, or just don’t read it, I don’t give a shit.

So Ho Chi Minh city. What a place. I took their hospitality, stamped it as my own, made myself a local and became a VIP, all in a week. I found a nice little bar that served generally ok Mojitos. I had been having a lot of people coming up to me saying “Boxer” and “Aussie” and I generally took this to mean they were admiring my general body sculpted frame. Nope. They were saying “You Boxing Kangaroo”. Haha, jokes on me, so I punched him. Nah I didn’t, but I did stop thinking I was awesome.

I went out to a nightclub with my mate and started drinking Jager & Red Bull. God only knows why, but it was tasty. We joked about buying a bottle and the bartender said that was cool, so we did! Once we shared that bottle with half the bar staff and customers around us, we bought another 2 bottles, apparently. I don’t really remember the end of this night. But I did wake up safely in my hotel, with my clothes on and all money and belongings.

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Oh the hangover. Went down for breakfast and had a bacon omelette which was the bomb. Then I thought, maybe I should do a city tour. So I grabbed a random dude with a motorbike, negotiated a price, and set off. About halfway around the tour I relaxed and rested my leg against the hot exhaust, instantly burning a chunk of flesh. I don’t know whether my tour guide could smell the meat, or noticed me swearing like a banshee, but he calmly turned around and said to me “Be careful, hot”. Thanks champ. I wasn’t really scared cruising around willy-nilly on the back of the bike, not until we were the only bike heading the wrong way down a one-way street into on-coming traffic. I think old mate had forgotten about the overweight westerner on the back and nearly lost control in front a truck. Good times.

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I decided like any man would that my burn needed to cool down, so I doused it in the beer I was carrying at the time. Relief! As it turns out, beer is no good for burn relief, what with the yeast and what not. I didn’t think it required any further treatment so it wasn’t until I got home and my sister, who’s a nurse saw it and made me go and get an antibiotic cream for it. See, it all works out in the end.

So after the city tour I was feeling like partying again, it was either the tour or the beer, who knows? I headed back out into the nightlife. Must have made an impression with all the shouting of drinks the night before, because every bar I went into I was ushered into a VIP spot. It was all going along swimmingly until I can’t remember. I woke up in the morning an hour out of the city in a dodgy hostel. Still had all my clothes, phone and wallet, but all my cash was gone. No one seemed to know where I had come from, and I felt like crap. I think my drink was spiked, but I don’t understand why, I still had both my kidneys too! I jumped on a scooter and got back to my hotel to recover for the whole day.

After a wasted day you think I would have learnt, but no. I just didn’t drink as much as before. Ok, I did, but I kept an eye on my glass the entire time. Basically, I spent the rest of the holiday doing short tours and visiting bars and meeting new people. Oh, I did manage to befriend a local and end up at their house for lunch and dinner a few times. The food there is fantastic, and I never got sick.

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The last night before leaving for the airport though I did go out and manage to have a huge night. Partied until 3am got home and found a street vendor selling noodles, I think all in all I had about 3 hours sleep. Decided not to fight it, went to a bar and kept going until the airport. A funny thing you should know. Make sure you change your time keeping device to the transfer airport time. I nearly got left in Changi airport because I thought I had an hour up my sleeve. Nope. For the second time in 2 weeks my name was being paged at an international airport. I generally don’t sleep in public at all, but my drinking, and the fact it was a night flight home and everyone else was sleeping, I took the opportunity to get a few hours in. I think I only farted on the flight once, well done me.

So now I have been home and housemate has been trying to get someone to move into her room still. We have had no success. . . . Until I made my own ad, had someone come and look at it, wants to move in, and then housemate decides that no, she is not sure if this person should move in. WTF lady? I am just over it now. I don’t care if she stays or if she goes. She’s not doing uni anymore so technically could stay, but has decided against that too. Who knows. All her plants are dead now, even the basil I was watering because I used to steal some died while I was away, along with the pumpkin plant. I guess there is nothing here housemate wants to live for.

That’s it so far, me in a nutshell at the moment. Love live is confusing so I am not going there at the moment, too hard basket to talk about. If I have missed something you want details on, write a comment and I will get back to you.

Live free die cheap!

Aussie Aussie Aussie

So day 2 started off weird.
I went for a walk in the morning and within half a hour had been offered smokes, hooch, pot, cocaine, massage, blow job (to be fair, this was a package deal with the massage), beer, a tour and a new phone. Where to start! One of the most interesting people I met was Mr Chow. He was offering the tours on his moped for 1 hour, complete with a notepad full of testimonials from other tourists. I didn’t think it was exactly safe all I declined. Then when I’d walked away, he followed me and offered to take to me to a massage with a happy ending. It wasn’t exactly clear that it wasn’t going to be him doing the massage and, well you know, but I wouldn’t have gone anyway. Thanks but no thanks Mr Chow.
I was then confronted with a urinal wishing me happy Valentine’s day complete with an LCD screen to watch. I couldn’t read the subtitles and it was a Vietnamese show, so it was kind of pointless.

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As with other countries, the cabling system leaves our technology for dust! This wire connects to this wire and this wire and this wire and this wire and something something. There was a guy, I’d like to say “repairing” but who knows, who was just sitting up on top of the wires doing something. No ladder, no traffic cones, no high vis. Just up there working away. Talk about confidence in your job!

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I think I’m wearing a shirt that screams “I am an Aussie!” because the number of people I meet who greet me simply as Aussie Aussie Aussie is incredible.

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I’ve met a Vietnamese guy called Thailand. What are the odds? I wonder if he understands the irony of his namesake, and it also makes me wonder if someone in Thailand is named Vietnam, just to even things out. I have been using a new Google camera  app with the image blur feature, and it’s really cool. There’s going to be more photos like this now.

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My Twitter seems broken too, I get Wi-Fi everywhere but Twitter won’t update or let me post anything, so it’s rather annoying. I think it’s certain Wi-Fi systems, but who knows.

I have arrived in Vietnam

Day 1: Arrival.
After drinking a few too many Singapore Sling’s on the way over, you could excuse me for forgetting they drive on the other side of the road here. Luckily the cab driver also found it amusing when I tried to jump in his side of the car! Good times.

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Found some cool bars, restaurants and street hustlers for dinner and drinks. The way I dance also seems to be a hit over here, so lucky I’m all good being Mr Popular and can take the attention. Went to a hookah lounge for my mate, found it odd, but I was able to spill my drink on 3 people, so they’ll remember me.

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It’s hard to see, but in one of the photos the sign advertising the bar says “Ugly But Good”. I guess they’ve figured their market and are sticking to it.

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I managed already to burn my hand doing a Vapour Lock shooter. This is more of a par for course than a surprise, and many other drinker’s got burnt lips instead, so I won that battle.

Home and in bed by 2 am having spent about $36.

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RIP Plants and Up, Up & Away

I came home the other day to find housemate had bought home 2 small plants  and left them on the kitchen sink, a mint and coriander. I felt sorry for them. They weren’t to know. They were going to be murdered. I refused to gift them a lifeline by looking after them, I don’t want housemate to think I am better at plants than she is (I am).

I’d completely forgotten about the plants until a couple of days ago. When I asked housemate about this, she said “Oh they died so I threw them out”. Poor little plants. Ironically, the pumpkin seed that I planted as a joke in one of her other pot plants on the balcony has started to sprout. I must confess, I thought I had sent this seed to its doom too, but it seems to be resilient enough to survive all of housemate’s attempts to kill living plants in our house. I wonder what she’s going to think when the pumpkin really hits its straps and starts growing big enough to grow a pumpkin! Exciting stuff.

We have had a couple of prospective housemate’s come and look at the room to see if they want to live there. First there was N, she was from Columbia and really liked the place, but thought it was a bit expensive. Why come and look then? The next applicant was V who was really keen but decided on a place that was furnished in the bedroom because she didn’t own a bed. S was pretty cool but was a guy and I’m reluctant to live with another guys and the place turn into a bachelor pad. Then on the weekend we had K who really liked the place, but was worried that I had too many parties. By parties, she means 2 or 3 of my friends coming over for drinks before heading out to dinner. Um, what? So K is out of the picture.

In other news, tomorrow I fly out for Vietnam and Hoi Chi Minh city! I’m only going for a week but it’s going to be fun getting out of the country, seeing other cultures and basically making a whole bunch of people think this is what all Australians are like. I can’t wait. I picked my seat in perfect position to be one of the first to be served drinks and food, and also in closest proximity to the toilet.

These are all important considerations when travelling in a plane for longer than 8 hours. I have this weird thing where I don’t sleep in public places, of which a plane is included. So basically for the entire flight including a stopover in Singapore, I will be awake. This is generally never an issue, because the inflight entertainment plus free alcoholic beverages always makes for a happy Adam. My fear of sleeping in public places stems from my apparent need to converse with strangers in my sleep, much to the amusement of other travelers. I have learnt my lesson, and so now I stay awake.

That’s it for now I guess, happy travelling me.

If you want to be kept in the loop of where I am and what I’m doing, follow me on Twitter (@Adsy_1) or add me to Snapchat (Egopanik). I can’t promise I will be entertaining, but I’ll give it my best shot.

My housemate and I are slowly breaking up.

I can see that this whole friendship with my housemate is going to turn into ruins, and it’s purely her fault. In evidence I would like to submit that her previous housemates who she was friends with for years are now no longer her friends because she left early on that lease as well. The writing was on the wall, and I didn’t notice it because I was farting around tilting pictures and what not. So she has previous history judge.

When she told me she wanted to move out I was fine with it, however I asked her to send the ad to me so that I could proof read it. Turns out, she has fucked this up and the ad has all sorts of mistakes on it. I asked her to fix it, I don’t think it has been. And then, she starts arranging times for people to come over and see the place and not even ask me if that time suits me. I kind of want to be able to meet the people who are planning on living with me. So she calls me with 2 hours notice and tells me someone is coming over. Just because she can’t afford to have a life, I have to put mine on hold and move shit around so that I can meet who I need to meet.

So now, tomorrow, on Good Friday, a public holiday, she has someone coming around at 8am. WTF!? I am totally starting to lose it because she is organising all these times. She doesn’t even have to be there when people come to look at the place, because she doesn’t have to live with them, so why is she doing the organising? Man it is doing my head in. I’m just, I can’t, I can’t even I am so angry.

So, if you want to live with me, click on the link, call my stupid housemate, and if I can be there I will be.

LIVE WITH ADSY – CLICK HERE

Wanted: New housemate. Apply within.

It’s been 2 weeks since I have been back and updated this that I feel like I should apologise, but then I think, you don’t care, so I won’t. Take it or leave it I say. Which is exactly what my housemate is doing. She has decided to move out!

This is actually a bit of a big deal. We moved out together for a number of reasons:
1.    We’re not attracted to each other in the slightest, so housemate rule hook-ups was a no brainer.
2.    We both wanted to be close to the city in a modern place.
3.    It was a new start.
4.    We are friends, but not besties, that had to hang out together all the time.
5.    We got along really easily.

So now we have to start an ad and I have to interview all the prospective people coming in. Go through all the rules, judge within a short amount of time if we’re going to be friends or mortal kitchen enemies, maybe work out if they have single friends of the female variety. I have also decided that if a couple wants to move in, then they can apply. It will be 2 against one then, but I am pretty sure I can handle it.

I’m actually not too worried about when my current housemate moves out and someone else moves in. I’m a pretty easy going character, and I also own all the furniture in the house except the stuff in my housemates room. I am hoping she either sells me the washing machine though, that’s the only thing she owns. Otherwise you’ll see me down in the spa with all my clothes, the bubbles turned up and soap suds going everywhere. Whatever it takes!

I wonder if we’re going to find the missing PS3 controller that I have finally stopped concerning myself with? I think at this stage, it will actually annoy me more if I find IT now than if I never know what happened to it. I also wonder if I will get a housemate that knows how to cook. Hmmm, there are benefits. At the least, someone might move in who doesn’t know how to use the internet, so I will be able to play tricks on them for a bit.

So, if you want to live in a decent suburb 5 mins from Brisbane CBD and don’t mind your life being spewed over the interwebs, hit me up. I might just have something.

Adsy is going abroad!

It’s been an interesting few days. Living With Adsy is going to be going abroad in the next couple of weeks while I enjoy a week long holiday in Vietnam. I wonder what sort of posts I will be doing while over there, if any, maybe I’ll save them for a big one when I get back. Maybe.

I wasn’t going to go to Vietnam, in that, I haven’t prepared for it or anything. My boss messaged me one night late (he might have been drunk) and asked if I wanted to visit Vietnam while he was there, his shout. I said yes before he had a chance to change his mind and la di da, I’ll be there for a week. I have got the visa and passport sorted, I hope our payroll lady overlooks that I don’t have enough annual leave hours, but oh well. I’ve never been to Vietnam, but I have travelled to Singapore, Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur and Phuket, so I’m pretty sure I know kind of what to expect. In any case, I am looking forward to it so it should be fun.

On Sunday, as is usually the case for a Sunday, I caught with some friends for some beers for a casual Sunday Session. It should be noted that if you’re in Brisbane and want to tag along, join our group (https://www.facebook.com/groups/232513986911291/) to find out where we will be. We sometimes forget to update it because we’re having too much fun, but I do check in from time to time.

I asked my housemate if she wanted to come with us this Sunday and she said no because she only had enough money for a beer and she was meeting friends at a different pub. Fair call, see you later on. I got home around 8pm and housemate wasn’t home. Finally made it to bed around 11pm. I did wonder how my housemate was going as she wasn’t home, but I’m not her dad, so meh.

I wake up in the morning though to find a random number had called me twice, and texted me, expecting me to leave the front door to our units open, and leave our unit door unlocked. Um yeah, sure thing. I mean, we’ve only had people climbing up balconies and coming into apartments anyway, why not just let them in the front door while I sleep off excess beer? As if I would do that. Anyway, I messaged the number back and I was informed that housemate was safe, so I went about my Monday.

Housemate has also proved once again that her inability to cook is a means of dieting. I think she manages to not eat as much as normal people because it black and stuck to the bottom of the saucepans. Seriously, just a shocking cook.

April Fools Day today, so like any normal person I wrapped up the majority of items on my co-workers desk in foil. I did a few other tricks and whatnot, but as it always just me doing it, the blame doesn’t get too far. The next day I am looking forward to is International Talk Like A Pirate Day aaaargh.

Have a good one.

 

Power Saver

It’s been an interesting week this week. My housemate has decided that where and how we are living is too expensive for her. She wants us to turn the lights out and use candles, and hang our clothes on the clothes line to save power instead of using the dryer. Hmmm, yeah OK. We’re also apparently using too much water for things like, living, so we have to cut back on that. What the hell lady, we’re not dating.

When we were looking for a unit to live in, we agreed we wanted something modern, clean, secure and she wanted a pool. So the unit we ended up with is all of those things, but also includes a new dishwasher, tennis court and air con. Apparently she wasn’t expecting the high costs associated with living with all these nice things! 

So I think (she hasn’t officially said anything), she is looking at share houses to see if that will save her money. So if that’s the case, I’m soon going to have a new housemate, or mates if a couple moves in. If a couple moved in that would be ideal. Cheaper rent to begin with, but also more enjoyable company.

In other news, the butcher that I regularly visit keeps giving me free samples to try of expensive meat. I am being blessed with free food the butcher gives me. It can’t get any better than that! I am yet to try out the sausage maker that I bought, but I think I have the basics down. It’s been good to get back into cooking and learning new flavours and using good food.

I was speaking to an old dude in the lift the other day and asked me if I was the guy who kept setting the alarms off in the lift. I admitted that yeah it was me, I was the one. He laughed, patted me on the back and said “I used to do that all the time when I first moved in here too. Every time I hear it go off, I get worried that I have done it, you’ll be right mate” and walked out. Thanks old dude.

Have a great weekend all.

Pivot, Left-turn, Changing of the guard, something something

I have been thinking about what the purpose was with this blog when I started it and how there are some things I feel like mentioning but really haven’t. The reason for this is probably because I started out writing about the trials and tribulations of the games I played on my housemate. Then there was the whole PS3 controller drama and blah blah blah.

There’s so much more to my life than housemate games and lost controllers. If I am going to write a blog about living with me, than you damn well better be able to live with me, and come along on all my travels of fun, games, and probably some pain too.

I mean, you guys all missed the whole me getting hit by a car in the parking lot by a nice old lady called Fran. The poor old bird just wasn’t paying attention and was in pretty bad shock, so I took her to the closest pub and bought her a beer. My leg only hurt for a few days anyway, and I’m sure that when the police knocked on her door later that afternoon and she was breath tested, it worked in my favour (just kidding).

So yeah, I really don’t know what sort of stuff is going to happen or end up being posted here now on. All I know is that it’s probably going to be a bit more frequent, hopefully as entertaining, and maybe, just maybe, a little bit closer to home in living with me.

Oh, I went to the zoo over the weekend. Here is a Red Panda.

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Just a quick update…

It’s been a while since I have updated you on the inner workings of my living arrangements. It’s been rather interesting, not as much fun, but otherwise just life.

Pretty sure the old PS3 controller has been stolen. We got a notice in the mail that there had been report of people climbing up the balconies and entering people’s homes. Apparently they are only taking small items like jewellery, cash and iPads. As our screen door had been cut, I am letting it go finally that someone stole a dodgy controller.

Housemate hasn’t noticed, or rather, hasn’t mentioned anything to me in regards to the messages in the mirror. I’m thinking this is a lost cause and have started to not bother. What I am doing though, is when she is in the shower, I turn the hot tap on and off repeatedly for a couple of minutes. This should hopefully stop her from having the super long showers and costing us all the money. HAHAHA, as if I care about that, it’s just fun.

I cooked my housemate dinner the other week. Crispy skin pork belly. She offered to cook dinner the next night but I was lucky and managed to come up with a legitimate excuse and avoided the torture. She’s not the best cook, in fact, she’s pretty bad. She burnt her scrambled eggs over the weekend. HOW DOES ANYONE DO THAT? Scrambled eggs has to be one of the easiest meals to cook! So for now the pot has been soaking in the sink for 2 days, I refuse to clean it.

In semi-related news, I cooked for someone special a better meal overall with crispy skin pork belly, but I fucked up the crispy skin! I was trying too hard to make it nice, and I burnt the hell out of it. Not my finest moment in the kitchen at all and very embarrassing for me, but apparently it was still good. I will redeem myself and cook the meal again so they can see I can cook it properly! I hate it when I make myself look like a noofie in the kitchen.

I have noticed we had the beginning of a covert ant operation attempting to break into our house and take up residence. Currently the war has been swinging my way, although this is going to be an ongoing battle with determination from both sides pretty high at the moment. This is a war I will not lose though.

As my housemate is now studying Uni and always in her room pretty much, the fun things I get to do are minimal. Hopefully this improves in the future. As you were.

Everyone In My Building Knows Me Now

What an interesting few days the weekend has given me. I asked for the Saturday night off work so I could go to a beer festival and they gave me Friday night off too. I didn’t plan on going out Friday, so decided I was going to just sit at home and veg out. Turns out I didn’t do that as I went and had some average pizza with fantastic company, so it was a great night in the end.

One would think that, if you have a night off from working until usually 3am that you would sleep in and enjoy the extra time. Not my body clock. 6 hours sleep was all it wanted to gift me, standard fare. I decided on bacon & eggs and a breakfast beer were in order. I mean, I was going to a beer festival after all. By the time my friends showed up, I was 3 beers deep already and had another 2 before we left the house.

The beer festival was great. I had to go on an emergency hunt for some sunscreen. If there’s one thing a ranga doesn’t like, it’s being unnecessarily burnt. A few beers later, high five’s with a stranger, a 3-legged race with a jogger and a few whisky sour cocktails, it was a decent night. At one point during the night my friends got hold of my phone and tried to unlock it. My security app meanwhile was snapping photos of them and helpfully emailing me the location of the phone. I didn’t find the emails until the following day, but it was funny.

I caught a cab home with a cool dude called Juneet. He did not like to be called cabbage, so I called him cabbage with every sentence. “So cabbage, is it a busy night for you?” “How often do you drive over this bridge in a week cabbage?”, that sort of stuff. He was cool though because he laughed it off when I got out of the cab.

This weekend though, I made sure that everyone in my building was aware of me living in their midst, and not just my housemate. By the time I walked in the door after the beer festival it was about midnight or a little bit after. In my semi-drunken stupor (I was actually rather behaved), I accidentally pressed the alarm in the lift. Now, this is an old building, with a really loud alarm. The manager had to come out and turn it off. This is not the first time I have done this. The manager was not happy. I can’t speak for the other residents in the building, but I am now sure they are aware of what the alarm sounds like at that time of night. Sorry guys.

The next morning when I got in the lift to go to the shops, there was a big letter explaining how the elevator buttons worked, and the new rules for what happens if you set the alarm off in the middle of the night. I like to think of the service I provide as helping policies become commonplace. My building will thank me in the end, surely.

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I’m Starting With The Man In The Mirror

It’s been an interesting week to say the least. The mystery of the PS3 controller has deepened and frankly, I don’t hold much confidence in it ever being solved. I need to really move on and find other things to do. So that’s what I have done, sort of.

As you know, the guitar trick was progressing along nicely, however last night it hit a snag. Both the guitar tutor and housemate have decided that, for some unknown reason, the guitar just needs to be tuned each time it is used, specifically the D-string. Now the trick has come around to bite me on the butt because obviously, I can’t just stop doing it all of a sudden. So now, even though it will be noticed, they are just tuning the thing by default anyway. Ugh, the deflation of enjoyment. I’ll slowly ween myself off it.

So this morning I got the opportunity for a rare game that i have played before, but nothing was said about it, so i think consistency is the key here. This is not something i can do every day though, this one will take a while to works it’s way into the regime of funniness.

What i do is go into her bathroom (I’m allowed in there anyway, it’s shared space, because it doubles as the laundry) and write messages on the mirror in the steam. Things like “I’m hiding in the bath” or “This bathroom is my home”. Today’s little gem was “I’m watching you shower”.

Now, each time i have done this, nothing! She hasn’t said a thing. This is a woman who thinks there is a ghost in our house based on my previous pranks. Surely messages written on the mirror are being noticed? Maybe she cleans the mirror each day and i haven’t accounted for this? This is going to be a time investment.

For the record, I am still moving my wine glasses around the house into random spots to keep the whole “It’s happening to me too” excuse.

Who knows what’s going to happen with this one. If she mentions anything about this scaring her, I will simply own up to this one and be honest. I mean, surely she can take a bit of a joke, right?

Did Someone Break Into Our House?

I was riding the elevator yesterday with another resident of our building. By riding I mean I tend to stand in it and tweet and forget to press the floor I need to go to. That’s how I accidentally walked into the penthouse one day, but that’s a whole other story.

When I was getting out on my floor she said “Hey, just to let you know, someone came into our apartment and stole some cash. We think they climbed up past your balcony so, be careful”. Great, thanks for telling me this now lady!

So I went inside my place and looked around. Nothing seemed to be missing as far as I could tell. . . . EXCEPT FOR THE DAMN PS3 CONTROLLER! Have we found the reason? I mean, disregard for the moment the fact the PS3, TV, HDD, DVR and many other such expensive items in the unit haven’t gone anywhere! But could it be the explanation?

When my housemate got home I told her about the break-in upstairs. What happened next shocked me more than anything else, and I know she does it. She actually said “O M G”, like the letters. If you are going to say the letters, JUST SAY THE DAMN WORDS! She has also thrown around “lol’s” here and there too. I can’t believe how much that annoys me, I don’t even know why. I think I’m just embarrassed for her.

Anyway, aside from actually pronouncing acronyms, she went all crazy and checked all the doors and windows. We now have a new rule in our house, lock the glass door, not just the screen door. The reason for this is she found a tear in the screen door right next to the lock. I never would’ve noticed it, so kudos to her.

So, could this be the reason the PS3 controller has disappeared from my house?

Is this the final result in my frantic search for the missing PS3 controller?

Can I sleep at night safe in the knowledge some thief stole a semi-working item and didn’t touch anything else?

The answer my friends is no. I am still vexed with knowing what happened to it. I still check the house for it, thinking I have missed somewhere. I am sure any neighbours who look in my windows at night think I have some weird OCD issue.

Here’s another strange thing about me: I just assume people look in my windows to see what I am doing, so I try to put on a show for them. I only think they do, because I know that I do it to them. I wonder if they too put on a show.

She’s Innocent! So the mystery continues…..

I’M CALLING IT NOW!

I do not believe my housemate is responsible for the missing PS3 controller. That being said, the damn thing is still missing, so now there are 2 people in the house looking for a chunk of black plastic in unrealistic locations. It has been quite the journey losing this, I mean, how does it just disappear? Even on Saturday night I had dreams that one of my Twitter followers had somehow managed to get into my house, steal the controller, and was sitting back watching the madness they have created. Anyway….

So this is how I am sure the PS3 controller is just missing and not some elaborate joke my housemate has managed to pull over on me. She got home Sunday night from her weekend away, but spent the time studying, so I didn’t see her. I decided last night I was going to cook crispy skin pork belly for dinner. Then I thought, no one in their right mind can lie after their housemate cooks them pork belly. So I offered to cook my housemate dinner. She was going to dancing and would be home later, so I had time to perfect it.

Before she left for dancing we had a brief catch up. During the course of the chat, I bought up the PS3 controller gone missing. She pointed to the new one and said “It’s right there you idiot”. I let the comment slide and told her “Nope, that’s the new one I just bought”. She then looked confused, and started to look for the old control in all the same places I have done. This was the first step to believing the control is genuinely missing. Off she went to dancing while I stayed at home, cooked dinner, and started to enjoy a little too much red wine.

When she got home, dinner was ready and i was pretty tipsy from the red wine. She thought my dinner was so great, she took a photo of it. Now this is how i know she didn’t hide the controller: SHE POSTED THE PHOTO TO FACEBOOK. Not only that, but her post read, and I quote “Best housemate ever! Yum!!!” It was at the end of dinner I again brought up the case of the controller. I even said to her “I kind of thought you took it as a joke”, to which she replied “Hahaha no, I can never think of jokes to do, and besides, I wouldn’t make you spend money on a new controller”.

BOOM! She’s in the clear.

So, to recap:

  • We still have a missing PS3 controller somewhere in the house.
  • The painting that lost the blutak and I tilted has been straightened with added blutak.
  • The D-string on the guitar is still de-tuned. Guitar practice is tonight, so this should be fun.
  • The ice cube trays have been filled once by housemate. Last night I emptied them all into my ice cream container, so let’s see where we land on that one.
  • My housemate likes my cooking, because I’m good at it.

I’m also taking ideas for other subtle pranks that I can play on her. Remember here, the trick is subtlety over a long period of time. Let me know in the comments if you have ideas.

 

Ice Is Nice

I still haven’t got to the bottom of this whole PS3 controller debacle. I decided to play the situation cool and not mention that I had either found the old one, or bought a new one. I have simply got the new one sitting where the old one used to. This is not to say that housemate isn’t to blame for the old one, or is innocent. No matter how much I want to put this to the back of my mind and move on, I just can’t until I find out what happened to the old one. I still find myself checking the same spots over and over again, even though it’s not there. This has tweaked my noodle more than I want to admit.

Is this what it is like to feel guilty?

In other news, while housemate was away all weekend I came to notice that she never refills the ice cube trays after using the ice. This may seem like a small issue but it’s not. I am a bartender, I need ice, not just want it. How unprofessional would i look if people came over, and I had a single cube to offer them for their drink? I can’t be that guy. I will not be that guy.

There are two ways that i could go about this (actually there is a third way, but that wouldn’t be as fun). The first is to suck it up and just refill the trays myself. Do I really sound like someone who likes to “suck it up and move on”? The second way is to do what I have done. Instead of keeping the ice in the provided ice cube trays, I am now emptying them into an ice cream container in my section of the freezer. Housemate doesn’t eat ice cream, so this is the perfect hiding spot. I’ll have lots of ice, and she will either have to refill them or go without.

Your move housemate.

For anyone who is interested, the third way to go about the whole ice cube thing would be to talk to her about it and ask her to refill them for me. But where’s the fun in that?

Stalemate

I have to believe that my housemate has not hidden the PS3 controller. If I step down this path even once, so many more considerations will need to take place. Not that my housemate isn’t cool enough to be able to pull off this prank, no no, it’s just that I highly doubt she would do this.

So here I am at the moment, in a kind of stalemate. She hasn’t come home yet from her birthday weekend away. I have totally, more than once, looked through the entire house for this elusive controller. It’s nowhere to be found.

Yesterday I thought the best way to find it would be to buy a new one, because in normal circumstances, Murphy’s Law would kick in. This was not the case. The presence of the new controller has not seen the old one miraculously appear in a logical place.

I’m at a crossroads. I’m pondering whether I call my housemate’s bluff and pretend I haven’t bought a new controller and have just found the old one. If she is not to blame for the missing controller, she’ll be the none the wiser. However, should she be to blame for it, then I’ll know I’ve been caught out and she’ll be one up on me.

Then there’s also the possibility she has nothing to do with it, I go along it’s the same controller, and she amazingly, innocently finds the old one. Then I’ll be stuck between a rock and a hard place. Where did this second controller come from all of a sudden if I “found” the original, and she has “found” the actual original?

This is a good time to reflect on the paranoia that can become a beast in its own right. I’m completely confident she didn’t hide the original controller, but not 100%. That little bit of doubt is what makes this so much fun.

The saga continues.

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Breaking: Have I Been Caught Out?

I think, like, I’m really concerned that my housemate has either figured out I’m responsible for some jokes on her, or we do have a ghost in the house.

Being that it’s her birthday today, she has gone away for the weekend. I wanted to play the PS3, but I couldn’t find the controller. I have seriously turned the house upside down looking for this thing. I’ve resorted to looking in places it’s impossible to fit into, or places that it shouldn’t be, like the fridge or dishwasher.

I even casually messaged her to see if she knows about. She just replied that “No, I haven’t used it in ages”.

2 things can happen here. She’s caught me and is calling my bluff… OR, I’ll buy a new one and will find the old one as soon as I get home. I’m hoping for the latter, I’m sure it’s the latter.

Anyway, I felt this was an important situation to tell you all about. I’ll update accordingly.

Happy Birthday Housemate

My housemate celebrates her birthday today. As we work conflicting hours, our paths don’t cross too often. This is good and bad.

Currently she is on some health kick and trying to remain alcohol and sugar free. I’m helping with this by always offering glasses of wine, sharing my chocolate and other things, to be polite of course.

So last night I got home late after she went to bed. I baked her a chocolate mud cake. I left it for her this morning. I know she will eat it, she can’t resist, because she wants to be polite too you see. It’s fun isn’t it?

As a small gift, I also bought her some guitar picks. She seems to lose them all the time (read: I systematically hide them), so this will make me look caring.
As it’s a special day for her, I also left her a bottle of her favorite wine to celebrate with after work while enjoying her cake. Yes I might be evil, but you can’t tell me she doesn’t enjoy having her cake and eating it too.

Happy Birthday Housemate.

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